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Crying and spanking

Spanking Classics » Spanking Discussions » 2008 - Jan thru to Dec » 2008 - November » Crying and spanking « Previous Next »

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Pesky
New Spanko
Username: Pesky

Post Number: 26
Registered: 11-2008
Posted on Thursday, November 20, 2008 - 03:23 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

Do you like to be spanked to the point where you lose all self control and cry? does it improve the experance and bring you somehow closer to your Dom? Or does you crying scare your Dom, so they stop, without you having used your safeword?

Personally i have never cried during spanking, whether it is for punishment, or for maintance> so i am really curious.
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Emmapseudonym
Spanko
Username: Emmapseudonym

Post Number: 760
Registered: 02-2008
Posted on Thursday, November 20, 2008 - 08:33 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

I've never been spanked like that, so I don't know. Sometimes when I cry, I feel a kind of out of control panicky feeling that I don't like, especially if I want to stop crying but can't, and I have asthma so crying is physically problematic now. I try not to have a need to cry nowadays. Thankfully, my life is very happy, so I hardly ever do. But I can also cry from various reasons, like if I'm angry and frustrated, or from release of physical tension, such as if I'm physically exhausted--when I finally allow myself to rest and stop holding myself upright from sheer will power, then I start crying. Or if I cry from grief or loss, I feel a little better afterwards. My evil ex-husband used to make me cry all the time, but he did it with mean and hurtful and untrue words (and I don't ever want to cry THAT way again). I have rarely if ever cried from physical pain, though I think I have once or twice had tears in my eyes or an audible sob or two from a sudden hard bump or bruise, with no emotional aftereffects. I may cry from despair, if I feel powerless. I do feel safe and comforted if somebody holds me when I cry, and I feel closer to that person after that. So I guess how I would feel afterwards would depend on what exact reason caused me to cry during the spanking, and I would want the top to notice and stop and hold me if I did start crying.

I will cry at the drop of a hat if I feel that I have hurt or disappointed someone I care about, or failed in some obligation, so if I were going to cry at a punishment-type spanking, I think I would be bawling my eyes out before it ever started. But in that case I would welcome the spanking at that moment, to relieve the burden of guilt. I might need the spanking so I could stop crying, LOL. :-) At least I think so, as I am only imagining this and have never put myself in that position.

I think if a vanilla spanked me and made me cry, it would scare him so bad he would never spank me again. I suppose spanko tops and doms are more used to it.

EmmaP
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Lynn66
Advanced Spanko
Username: Lynn66

Post Number: 1900
Registered: 02-2008
Posted on Thursday, November 20, 2008 - 08:46 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

For me it depends on what the spanking is for. If it is a gg or erotic spanking, crying is not what I am after. If it is for any other reasons, yes, I would like tears shedded. Tears for me help clear both the mind and the soul.

"If you lose your mind, mosey on over. We'll keep track for you." - Mindy Neff

"I'm never wrong. Just ask me; I'll tell you"- Cheryl Holt
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Pagan
Senior Spanko
Username: Pagan

Post Number: 7168
Registered: 12-2003
Posted on Thursday, November 20, 2008 - 10:57 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

Although I certainly did as a child, I don't cry from physical pain. I've never even come close to tears from the pain of a spanking; I gave birth to a nine-pound kid without analgesia and didn't shed a tear. I screamed blue murder, but that's a different matter.

A spanking can help me destress, but I don't seek tears as catharsis.
"Self esteem isn't everything; it's just there's nothing without it ..." - Gloria Steinem

"If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything." - Mark Twain

"There's nothing to writing. All you do is sit down at a typewriter and open a vein." - Walter Wellesley Smith

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Lady_katy
Advanced Spanko
Username: Lady_katy

Post Number: 3461
Registered: 12-2002
Posted on Thursday, November 20, 2008 - 12:34 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

For me the tears usually come after the spanking and are much more emotionally related than pain related.

Also I find that sobs are very different than tears. I sill sob during a spanking but no actually tears run.
"Good little Girls Make Mighty Wild Women"

and everyone KNOWS I am a good little girl.


Embrace the chaos that is your life. It may well be your only constant.
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Moogi
Junior Spanko
Username: Moogi

Post Number: 118
Registered: 01-2008
Posted on Thursday, November 20, 2008 - 01:46 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

I've never cried from a spanking and I don't really want to. I like my spankings sexy and fun and non-painful, even when they're hard. I'm pretty sure if I started crying, Hubby would stop and cuddle me.
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Skylar
Advanced Spanko
Username: Skylar

Post Number: 2716
Registered: 02-2008
Posted on Thursday, November 20, 2008 - 03:58 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

I don’t think spanking is only physical…at least not for me. I think only about 50% of a spanking is physical, the other half is emotional and I am a very emotional person.

However, I hate it when people see me cry. If I start to get emotional and I’m in public, I will always leave and head for a private location. It makes it really tough when I sometimes cry at the drop of a hat. I have no idea why I am like that, it is a weird little quirk I have. I just don’t like to let people see me cry. I know my husband knows I am an emotional person, but I try so hard to not let him see me cry either. I feel week and silly if I cry in front of someone…anyone. If for some reason I can’t stop the tears and hubby is there, he has always been wonderful and has comforted me, but I still feel embarrassed.

I have cried lots of times in private. It’s not a depression thing, its cause I feel good after a good ‘cry’. I feel as if I have released some stress and can move on…but it has to be in private….otherwise I am more concerned about people watching me cry rather then letting loose the tears.

Soooooo….spanking is the same thing for me. If hubby is spanking me, and I am an emotional wreck when it starts and feel like I am going to shed a few tears, I will make sure the lights are down and my face is turned away so he cant see that I might cry. Its really weird…I know. I have even let a few tears fall after really good sex with hubby (from the emotional release)……but again, I always go to the restroom or turn my face away so he cant see me cry. (but I think he might be able to tell sometimes cause he'll get a little more cuddly or ask if I'm ok. I always giggle it off....I know...I'm weird that way.)

I dont get spanked for punishment..only in play and erotic fun and sometimes if he thinks I am stressed. I think one of these days, I might let loose a floodgate of emotions during a spanking and I have no idea how I will handle it. I wouldn’t be crying from the physical pain, but from the emotional release. We are still new at this and the more hubby and I grow in our spanking relationship, the better he is getting and the more I am able to get that release from spanking……..so one of these days………..

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Paddledprincess
Intermediate Spanko
Username: Paddledprincess

Post Number: 480
Registered: 01-2005
Posted on Friday, November 21, 2008 - 05:27 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

I got to the point where I lost my self-control and cried ONCE during a spanking...and I was almost hysterical...and it was a vanilla spanker, he stopped and flipped out. But it felt really wrong.

My Dom, being more experienced, I do not think would be moved by the tears...especially as he understands me so well, he knows when there's a problem without me having to say anything. I had a panic attack during my last punishment and that didn't even scare him. He waited, let me ride it out, didn't "break character" but made sure I was okay and let me know he was still there. As soon as I was okay, he made me go on my tip-toes to help my concentration and continued. (Honestly I don't think it could have been handled in a better way than he handled it.)

Hehe, I always thought that I would bawl if I got a real good spanking...that maybe my Top just didn't really know what he was doing and I just don't cry.. But it turns out that I have an amazing pain tolerance and stamina level. I took a rather...erm...intense spanking in which I was asked into 6 different positions and given about 5 different implements...and that didn't even drive me to tears. The very end where he pulled out the hairbrush over his knee, I did have a couple of sobs, but only for about 6 seconds.

Strange to me because I cry A Lot in the real world...I just don't cry when I'm being spanked. I know my Dom and I have tested my limits...but I don't cry.
If you check right, my attitude is always more brat than bottom
But my bottom can always cash the checks my attitude writes.

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Scunge
Advanced Spanko
Username: Scunge

Post Number: 1231
Registered: 06-2008
Posted on Saturday, November 22, 2008 - 12:57 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

I've only full out cried twice both times after rather severe punishments. The tears did not come during the spankings however but after. I have a real love/hate relationship with the flogger that I bought this Summer.
This will all end in tears-Miss Hardbroom Worst Witch
------------------------------------------------
Good little girls get ice cream. Bad little girls get spanked. Good little bad girls get BOTH! I am a good little bad girl! KW
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Persephone
Advanced Spanko
Username: Persephone

Post Number: 1976
Registered: 12-2003
Posted on Saturday, November 22, 2008 - 08:07 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

i have cried from spankings exactly twice.

one time i was in the midst of a very emotional time (it was this past spring when my mother was dying) and i asked to be spanked-- i think when the tears came it was more about gratefulness than anything else. my lady was spanking me and she knew not to stop even though i was crying. the tears were really good for me at that time.

the other time was during my most severe punishment ever. i cried from the frustration of how awful it was, and how terrible i felt for deserving it. my owner knows me really well (after all he had been punishing me for over 2 years before i cried at his hand) and he didn't stop because i was crying. i was glad that he didn't because it was very powerful for me to be crying during the spanking. eventually the crying stopped when the switch that he was using on me broke. i couldn't help but laugh and then the spell was broken.
"the pain passes but the beauty remains"
-pierre august renoir

my blog, persephone's obedience
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Brennarose
Spanko
Username: Brennarose

Post Number: 924
Registered: 02-2005
Posted on Sunday, November 23, 2008 - 10:53 am:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

I cry from serious punishment spankings for many reasons. Sometimes the reason is the pain of the spanking but a lot of the times it is an emotional reaction to the behavior and consequences. My husband can make me cry with just a lecture. Crying is not the norm but it does happen. I don\\'t get serious punishment spankings very often, discipline or corrections; but not real punishment. Sometimes for me it is just an emotional release that I needed.
"I still light up like a candle burning when he calls me, I still melt down like a candle burning every time we touch...
by Annie

In the New Year, I give you my love, my respect and my submission. You are my Rock!


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Honeyspank
Junior Spanko
Username: Honeyspank

Post Number: 191
Registered: 03-2007
Posted on Sunday, November 23, 2008 - 09:01 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

I rarely cry from a spanking. Mostly, I just squirm, yell and cry out, beg, plead, promise...the usual. Lately I've been trying a roll off his knees and drop onto the carpet move. Which is not exactly a solution to my problem of being spanked at the time.

Sometimes I wish I could cry though. I often feel on the verge but never actually spill tears.

The first time I cried was when my first spanker gave me a punishment spanking. He is the least harsh of any spanker I have known and all the emotion of feeling bad at what I had done had me crying before he actually started spanking. I cried throughout that whole long spanking but none of those tears were from physical pain.

I dont know if I felt closer to him but I certainly felt cleansed and forgiven afterward, due to his kind and sincere words.

My BF has only made me cry a couple of times. Once and I was really tired and it was very late at night...I remember being in the corner knowing he was not done yet and I really wanted to just be done and go to sleep. That time involved both emotion and pain.

A couple of other times were just hard spankings to take..I dont really remember why, but I did cry.

Tears don't make him stop spanking however. At least not right away. Becoming hysterical is just not me and he knows that. I actually yelled "YELLOW!" the other day and he actually chuckled at me a little. I have never used a safe word before and I was having one of those "Damn! I cant take this right now!" moments and thought I'd try 'yellow'....

He stopped spanking soon after that and later when I said "You ignored me" he said "Yellow is not your safe word, is it?" I said " No....it isn't". So if needed, I suppose it would be a good idea to use the actual agreed upon safe word. He said with an evil grin, "Try YOUR safe word next time".

So perhaps I'll do that.




"A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand."
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Shewolf
Senior Spanko
Username: Shewolf

Post Number: 13165
Registered: 06-2003
Posted on Sunday, November 23, 2008 - 10:13 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

I've never cried during a fun or playful spanking, there's no need. Disciplinary spanking depends...what the implement is, what the offense is, and how badly I feel about what I've done. I rarely cry, but when I do there's not many tears shed. Crying doesnt usually make me feel better, in fact most of the time it makes me more blue than I was before. A hard cry can leave me exhausted both physically and emotionally.

The only time I actively sought tears was after my mother died. It seemed I'd been crying off and on forever, but then all my tears just dried up and I couldnt cry even when I wanted to. The pressure was building inside me, but no tears. I finally asked my Dom for a breaking spanking to help with the problem, and he agreed.

The spanking itself was a little frightening and definitely painful...although I think most of that was really in my mind. But once the flood of tears was released there seemed to be no end to them, it felt like I cried for hours. Steve held me and held me, rocking me like a baby until I finally stopped. The peace I felt afterwards was wonderful and I would go through it again of I needed to...although I hope I dont have to! :-)

wolfie[D]
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Indiana_dave_4
New Spanko
Username: Indiana_dave_4

Post Number: 18
Registered: 04-2008
Posted on Monday, November 24, 2008 - 10:09 pm:   Edit Post Delete Post View Post/Check IP    Move Post (Moderator/Admin Only)

Saw this theme and wanted to ask a question:

Hi all, Haven't written anything since I met the first female partner to spank (sex is not involved). She is level headed and only needs spankings for stress (I guess that's what it's called. She's experienced sub space a number of times and always wants to set another date.

I'm about to start with a second woman. She contacted me and is wanting a disiplinarian. While I've read a few articles this is new ground for me. I want to avoid the extremes: to much or to little. any thoughts?

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